The Truth About Equivalent Exchange
by videogameandanime-empress
Summary: Edward meets a mysterious alchemist who can transmute without a circle, in other words someone else whose seen the gate. But she has a different view about alchemy and equivalent exchange, can she teach Edward what being an alchemist is all about?
1. What we lose

**(A/N) I'm trying to be more descriptive in my fanfics (that's what most complaints are about). This will probably be only a few short chapters but I'm not fully sure yet.**

**Disclaimer: Unfortunately I am not nearly as good of a manga author as Arakawa so I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist, though I do own several FMA stuff, necklace, watch, dvd, book, cards, ect.**

_She could feel the gashes in her arms bleeding immensely, and her internal injuries made her cringe with horror. The tears slowly flowed from her face. _

_"It's over," she whispered "I have nothing left to live for. And it's all my fault." _

_She held his limp body close to hers, gripping him with all her strength, hoping she could once again feel his heartbeat._

_She turned around to see the flames engulfing the building she once stood in. She felt the burns on her face, and then his. _

_'It's my own damn fault,' she thought coughing up more blood 'I can't live with myself knowing I caused this...unless I bring you back.' she looked down at his face partway covered by his brownish blonde hair that fell in his face, brushing off the ashes._

_"If I must," she said aloud "I'll sacrifice myself."_

_She drew the transmutation circle on the ground, praying it would work. _

_Then, she slowly lowered her hands and activated it._

-

"Edward!" Roy Mustang yelled at the sleeping teenager.

"Wha..?" Ed replied with a small bit of drool escaping his mouth.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Roy commanded.

"I was told" Ed cleared his throat "you wanted to see me, but when I came, you weren't here so I sat down and...fell asleep I guess."

Roy let out an annoyed sigh "There was this girl who kept coming around here requesting to see you." Roy walked over to his desk and sat down. "I told her you were on an important assignment and weren't in central at the time, but she kept coming back. Every day she'd come in begging to see the alchemist who can transmute without a circle. After awhile it started pissing me off, so I told the guards not to let her in." The look on Roy's face became more irratated. "Apparently she's a rather skilled alchemist and was able to easily sneak in here and I caught her snooping around asking to talk to anyone who could transmute without a circle."

Ed, now fully awake, got curious "What did she look like?"

"A bit shorter than you, as hard as it is to imagine that," Roy smirked "had long blonde hair, sort of sickly looking, and had silvery blue eyes."

"Hm..." a puzzled look went over Ed's face "Dont' know anybody that fits that description. Were there any other distinguishing things?"

"Other than the fact that she always wore baggy black pants, steel toed boots, and an out of place looking locket..." Roy smiled "she always wore a tight white tank top."

Realizing Riza Hawkeye had entered the room, Roy could feel her icey glare. "Anyway" he said, his grin fading from his face "I want you to search for her, she should be somewhere in central."

"And what do I do when I find her?" Ed questioned anxiously.

"Whatever the hell it takes to keep her out of here." Roy said.

-

"Gee thanks a lot Roy..." Edward said putting his hands in his pockets, looking around at his surroundings "just send me out here to blindly search for some psychopath that's after me."

Ed walked over to a telephone booth and called Alphonse.

"Hello?" Ed heard his brothers voice.

"Hey Al." Ed replied "How're Winry and Pinako?" Ed thought about how as soon as he and his brother heard their friends had caught the fatal and contagious disease that was going around, Al had rushed to aid them.

Al said in a depressing tone "Winry's getting better but I'm not sure about Pinako..."

"Damn" Ed said with a trace of anger in his voice "I really wish I could be there to help-"

"No brother." Alphonse quickly said "You know you'd catch it and I don't want that."

"I know..." Ed said calming down "Well I guess I'll talk to you later."

"Yeah, bye."

"Later."

Ed hung up the phone and sighed.

He turned around and saw a girl with a cloak pulled tightly around her, sitting beneath a tree crying.

As he slowly approached he could hear her whisper the name Toyo.

"Hey are you alright?" He quietly asked.

"Go away." she said not looking up.

"Geez don't be such a bitch about it." Ed said annoyed.

She looked up with cold eyes and scanned him up and down until she saw his watch.

"You're a state alchemist..." she softened her look "the youngest state alchemist...Fullmetal."

She jumped up "Fullmetal please help me!" she yelled in his face.

"Whoa what a change of attitude."

Dropping her cloak to the ground she slowly approached Edward and hugged him making him blush.

"Sorry if I seem kind of odd...but I really need your help...please."

"Um okay.." suddenly ed recognized her as the girl Mustang had described to him earlier.

"Edward, have you seen the gate?"

Ed's hands which he unconciously had wrapped around her began sweating. "Why...what are you...I mean.."

"Is that why I can transmute without a circle...because I've seen the gate?"

Ed closed his eyes trying to block out the image of that damn gate from his memory. "Yes."

"Why," she hissed "do I keep gaining, from my mistakes..."

**(A/N) Please review, and I promise to update soon, BYE.**


	2. What we gain

**(A/N) Even though this is supposed to be a tradgedy I'm having fun writing it...**

"What...what do you mean?" Edward was startled by what she said.

"I mean..." she released him from her grasp "that even though, I commited the ultimate taboo in alchemy, even though it's my fault my brother is dead...I keep on gaining."

"But what about..." Ed was confused.

"Equivalent exchange...well I'm sure it applies from one perspective but...if you really think about it I'm recieving grace...I'm not getting what I deserve...death." she looked him in the eyes "I also gained too...I can transmute without a circle, something most alchemists would love to achieve. The only payment I suffer from is the guilt I feel every time I take a breath."

"But when you transmuted..." Ed rolled up his sleeve revealing his automail arm "didn't they take something...?"

"A physical loss..." she said slowly "isn't much of one. Both my legs are automail because of it though..."

-

_She could feel her limbs being torn off, first her right leg, then her left. The firey painful feeling almost overcame her. But she continued to press on, her voice becoming hoarse from screaming out to her brother. _

_"Toyo...Toyo! I have to see you one last time...let me know that I succeeded. Let me know that my life was worth something. _

_Suddenly she was on the ground in front of the now extinguished fire from the explosion she caused. _

_She could feel the rain pouring down on her, and could hear voices around her...but there were so distant from her, for her thoughts were only focused on one thing, that disgusting thing laying next to her, the thing she created._

_-_

"It was my fault that my brother Toyo died, you see, we lived on a small farm in the countryside. Our parents disappeared about two years ago, so we lived alone. I had been experimenting with alchemy in my room when I accidently caused a big explosion..." she began stuttering her words, crying between her pauses "It beat up Toyo really bad, and I don't know how I survived...The whole house was engulfed in flames by the time I found him bleeding to death, when he saw me I was in tears and he told me that I was stupid to cry like that...so I carried him out of the house and laid him on the ground in our front yard...But it was too late, because when I lated him down...he touched my face...and his hand fell loosely...because he died."

She cringed at the thought and her eyes filled with tears again. She walked over to the tree and sat down, covering her eyes.

"I'm such an idiot. I cry too damn much." she said half angry half joking.

"You're right," Ed walked over and sat down next to her "you shouldn't cry." he leaned his head against the tree and closed his eyes "Cuz it makes other people sad to see it."

"Edward..." she whispered as she leaned her head against his shoulder "tell me everything...everything about yourself. I've heard a lot about you but...I want to know from you."

-

Edward hadn't known how long they had spent just sitting under a tree talking, crying, laughing, he never really cared. He knew they had seen the sunset more than once, but it hadn't seemed that long.

He just thought of it as a brief moment in time he could never have again.

She knew that they would have to depart soon, she knew she could never have that oppourtunity ever again, so she said it.

"Edward, you're the only one who's ever...understood...Edward...I love you." she said softly.

"You're such an idiot...if you had told me your name I could've said the same thing to you."

She smiled. Ed just made her feel that way. He made her feel like she needed to smile, something she hadn't done in awhile.

"That's a funny way," she said staring into the sky "of saying how you feel about me."

"I have a habit of doing things like that." Ed said standing up.

She stood up next to him and looked at his face.

"What's wrong?" she inquired.

"What makes you think somethings wrong, you barely know me?"

"Ed" she said laughing "anyone can read you like a book, it's all in those amber eyes. So, tell me, what's the matter?"

Ed sighed "I'd kinda like to go back to see my brother but...I'm not sure if I should go back yet or not, you know with the whole Winry and Pinako are ill thing.."

"Then call stupid." she pushed him into the phone booth, slapping his ass right before closing the door.

He gave her a dirty look, then dialed the number.

She soon fell to the ground laughing.

A few minutes later Ed came out and announced "Apparently my brother's an awesome doctor, cuz they're both cured!"

"Yay!" she said giggling "Only problem is you're leaving me here alone." She stuck her tongue out.

"Am not." he childishly said "I'm taking you with me..." he put his hands on her shoulders "but only because I want to know your name."

He leaned in and softly kissed her lips.

"Sakura" she whispered into his ear.

-

Sakura stood in the kitchen talking to herself.

"I hate when it's my freaking turn to make dinner. Stupid Winry and her 'I have work to do' excuse."

Then she felt the feeling she had every day for the past two months, the feeling of two hands gripping her shoulders. She was about to turn around and embrace Edward when she stopped and realized the hand on her right shoulder...was flesh.

She whirrled around to see the least expected and most horrifying thing she could ever see. It was Toyo.

**(A/N) Yeah I know it's short but...oh well review anyway.**


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